Where is My Head??

I haven’t been as dedicated as I told myself I would be. I tried to be strict about writing on a regular basis but it’s fallen by the wayside. Mom life is definitely coming easier but I’m still struggling to grasp back onto “me”. I feel like I’ve lost a large part of my personality since becoming a mom. 

Since I’ve been trying to climb out of this hole I’ve dove head first into crafts, fitness, and excessive Pinteresting. It’s unhealthy how much I’m on Pinterest and let me be clear…I am NOT a Pinterest mom (lol). 

Some days I spend 3+ hours supervising free play from my recliner while I Pinterest things I wish I could be doing. I’m not even sure what I hope to accomplish by writing about this but maybe if another mom stumbles across this post and can relate to this numbness I feel, maybe she’ll feel relieved that she’s not alone. Maybe she’ll feel enough sunshine to climb out of her own hole. 

I feel like my loss of concrete purpose is to blame. I’m no longer in school, no longer working, and I have no long term goals anymore. So, I’m just wandering…that’s the only thing I can equate it to. I suppose I’ll continue searching for my fleeing wit and work on being present. After all, that’s all any of us can guarantee.

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Momma Needs to Rant

Okay, so maybe I don’t need to rant,  but I at least deserve a good whine. I’m feeling very burnt out on life. I love being a mom. However, working and being a mom freakin’ blows. I want to spend my days playing with her. Trying to make myself be active and present with my career is becoming more of a task. I work from home most days, but I find it incredibly challenging to dedicate my time solely to working. I don’t have a babysitter so I attempt to work while she sleeps. I don’t see this working much longer. Her naps are becoming shorter and her time awake is filled with SO much more activity. 

I suppose the whole point of this weeknight whine session is to ask for input. I want to hear how other moms make it work. Help me! How do you continue to feel a “spark” with your career?? I long for the days when I can make a career out of my creative passions, but for now I need to make money to contribute to my family’s income and I desperately need some inspiration…