(Side note: cheers to me for posting two days in a row! 🙀)
When I became a mom I had this picturesque notion that I had at least 18ish months until I would be dealing with full fledged tantrums. I’m here to let all the readers know, I was wrong. I was devastatingly wrong.
At almost 10 months, we are now dealing with 5-10 tantrums a day. Let me reiterate…I had no freaking idea babies her age threw tantrums! So, I did what any other good, millennial mom would do. I Googled it 🙏🏼
The Google gods state that baby tantrums differ from toddler tantrums and they shouldn’t be handled in the same way. From what I gathered, baby tantrums arise out of a surge of emotion or frustration from not being able to move where said baby wishes or communicate wants or needs. (Insert mental dialogue: “Well shit. There is literally nothing I can do but continue guessing what she wants and help her ride the emotional roller coaster.”)
Folks I am here to tell you, this is hard and I am struggling. Today we tried repeatedly offering snacks, drinks, cuddles, and every toy in the house. I’d like to say I’m figuring her out but she’s like an entirely different person the older she gets. I love watching her evolve but girl is gonna give momma a drinking problem (as in coffee).
On a positive note, she learned where her nose is and how to point to it today. That’s a win, right?
I haven’t been as dedicated as I told myself I would be. I tried to be strict about writing on a regular basis but it’s fallen by the wayside. Mom life is definitely coming easier but I’m still struggling to grasp back onto “me”. I feel like I’ve lost a large part of my personality since becoming a mom.
Since I’ve been trying to climb out of this hole I’ve dove head first into crafts, fitness, and excessive Pinteresting. It’s unhealthy how much I’m on Pinterest and let me be clear…I am NOT a Pinterest mom (lol).
Some days I spend 3+ hours supervising free play from my recliner while I Pinterest things I wish I could be doing. I’m not even sure what I hope to accomplish by writing about this but maybe if another mom stumbles across this post and can relate to this numbness I feel, maybe she’ll feel relieved that she’s not alone. Maybe she’ll feel enough sunshine to climb out of her own hole.
I feel like my loss of concrete purpose is to blame. I’m no longer in school, no longer working, and I have no long term goals anymore. So, I’m just wandering…that’s the only thing I can equate it to. I suppose I’ll continue searching for my fleeing wit and work on being present. After all, that’s all any of us can guarantee.
I’ve been on Pinterest….okay I’m always on Pinterest, but recently I’ve been flooded with pins about having several streams of income and how that can lead to better financial stability and contribute to your “hustle.” So, I want to hear from other moms that have been dabbling in several arenas and using their creativity and talent to elicit extra income.
Referring back to my very first post, Day to Day Shenanigans, I currently work as an insurance agent and jewelry merchandiser with Chloe + Isabel. However, I find myself wishing for even more. I don’t wish for more money, but more
esteem…no pride in my capabilities. I want to be able to step back, glance around, and take some serious pride in my accomplishments.
Some would probably call me selfish. I would have to give them the middle finger. I love being a mom and I love my job, but I didn’t waste seven years of college not to use every damn skill I
gained, PAID FOR. In my perfect world, I would be a work from home mom (like I am now), continue with the insurance industry, earn my real estate license, flip houses, and sell crafts on the side. I wanted all these things before having a “side hustle” was even a thing. Now, I see people conversing about the principle of not having all your eggs in one basket and my dream seems oddly attainable for once. Sure, I’m exhausted and my hair is falling out from my crazy postpartum hormones, but maybe this could be my thing? Maybe all of that could be my thing.
I want to hear from other moms making it work with careers they LOVE…multiple money making niches they LOVE! If your stumble across this lonely, fresh, new mommy blog post, please comment…I’m here to connect. I just wiped old baby puke off my face; it’s been there for hours and I probably need a friend (even an online friend) that can relate to that on some level.
Okay, so maybe I don’t need to rant, but I at least deserve a good whine. I’m feeling very burnt out on life. I love being a mom. However, working and being a mom freakin’ blows. I want to spend my days playing with her. Trying to make myself be active and present with my career is becoming more of a task. I work from home most days, but I find it incredibly challenging to dedicate my time solely to working. I don’t have a babysitter so I attempt to work while she sleeps. I don’t see this working much longer. Her naps are becoming shorter and her time awake is filled with SO much more activity.
I suppose the whole point of this weeknight whine session is to ask for input. I want to hear how other moms make it work. Help me! How do you continue to feel a “spark” with your career?? I long for the days when I can make a career out of my creative passions, but for now I need to make money to contribute to my family’s income and I desperately need some inspiration…